There was a time when the motion picture industry was a shining star for American Arts.
There was Bogart, Grant, Gable, Brando, and Burton. There was Hepburn, Taylor, Leigh, Crawford, and Davis.
All were well respected and masters of their art.
Today computers and special effects rule the screen and the written word takes a back seat.
There was a time when the scripts called for death of a character and at the point of death the audience knew they were dead without any viewing of blood. Today’s films will have that character die with guts, eye- balls and brains spilling all over the screen. It is no longer an art on film. It is gore and absurdity in digital splendor.
“Hilarious”, “Brilliant”, “Daring”, “One of the Year’s Best.” All these phrases represent lead-in lines for commercials and trailers to encourage the public to go to the theatre and see the movie.
Whoever writes these lines has to be the biggest liar the world has ever known. How many times can you tell the public that this film is the best. In most cases the film isn’t any different than all the other disappointments you’ve had before from this generation of movie makers.
These are a few of my favorites and what they really mean and how we should read between the lines.
- Could be this year’s first blockbuster hit.
This represents that the film has no chance of being a blockbuster. Their attorney advised them to not use any words that may hold them liable for false advertising.
- Hilarious
Yea, it is hilarious if you are a bumbling buffoon that likes watching people get wedgies with vomiting and farting as 30% of the film.
- Never has a film gone this far.
If you go to a film like this you will know why no one has ever gone that far. No one in their right mind would fathom doing a film so disturbingly biased against America and displaying non-truths to manipulate sheepest liberals to feed from the trof of propaganda. 4. Robert De Niro, Matt Damon, Angelina Jolie, Joe Pesci, Al Pacino.
What a cast! A film like this will suck to high heaven. The studios can’t afford to pay full salaries to all these guys so you get 2 or 3 minutes from most of the actors and one of them boring you for the rest of the film. ‘The Good Sheppard’ sucked! I have a method for checks and balances for advertising honesty.
If I buy a roll of toilet paper that claims to be strong and the first time I use it my finger breaks through... Guess What? I ain’t buying it again. Use this technique with the movies. If the movie claims one thing and does another. take notice and never go to a film buy that director again. Observe the movie studio and treat them like the faulty paper. Flush’em. So now my Tuesday night movie date night with Cotillia is out. She gets pissed because I usually take the money for popcorn and Goobers and buy beer and hangout with my buds. Do you think these are grounds to sue the movie industry for emotional distress?
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